Reading Material (Rhythm Heaven Fever): Difference between revisions

[US] Thanks for buying Rhythm Heaven Fever! We've created a bunch of fun rhythm games for you. Everyone has rhythm-- even those who don't think they do! We hope you'll enjoy finding your own rhythm. So have fun and enjoy all the game has to offer.

[UK, Article is named 'Greetings'] Thank you for buying Beat the Beat: Rhythm Paradise! We created a range of fun rhythm games just for you! Everybody has a sense of rhythm, even if they are not aware of it. We hope you get to feel the joy of finding your rhythm through these games. So have fun and enjoy all the beat has to offer.

[US] I was practicing all the time, but my golf game just wasn't improving. A friend recommended that I see a golf coach he knew, and I figured it couldn't hurt. I went to our meeting place, expecting a middle-aged guy in ugly pants. That...wasn't what I got.

[UK, Article is named 'How to Get a Hole in One'] No matter how much I practised, I struggled to improve my golf score and couldn't even dream of getting a hole in one. I heard about  a pair of professionals through a friend that could guarantee results fast. I went to the place I had arranged to meet my new caddies to find a curious duo.

[US] At a secret hideout in an undisclosed location under a heavy veil of mystery and darkness...

 

[UK, Article is named 'Screwbot Secrets'] Somewhere, at a secret hideout...

[US] See: "Hey, Saw."

[UK, article is named 'See-Saw Inspectors'] "So, Mr Saw..."

[US] I've always wanted to learn the guitar but never had the nerve to try. When I finally did get up the courage, I found that SHE worked at the local music shop. She told me I had nothing to be afraid of, that playing guitar was simple. Easy for her to say-- everyone knows her band is big in Japan. I didn't have enough money to buy one that day, but she let me try out a guitar and showed me some chords. I came back a lot over the next six months while I saved up my allowance. Now I've bought my guitar, I've started a band, and I'm practicing a lot. I even wrote a song for her. Only problem is I can't bring myself to play it for her. So instead, I'll invite her to our first live show. After school, we sat on a bench together while I tried to work up the courage to give her the ticket I got her. My throat was parched, and my mind was racing. For some reason, some weasels were looking at us... And then a strange thing happened. A soccer ball came at us, and I reflexively gave it a good kick. It felt great! It calmed me down too. Even the weasels seemed happy. So I started kicking away my feelings...

 

[UK] I decided to take up the guitar and headed to the local music shop. That was when I first saw her. She was in the year above mine and already had a band which had won several competitions. I heard she'd even been approached by a famous music producer. I hadn't saved enough pocket money to buy a guitar but  I headed to the shop and she let me try one out. I went to the shop a lot after that. She was so helpful and her knowledge about guitars blew me away. Six months later I had bought that guitar, practised every day and even formed my own band. I just had to let her know my feelings for her with one of my own songs. But there was no way I could sing to her until I had learned to play better. And then it all seemed to fall into place. My band got its first gig and I hoped that she would come to watch us. I went to tell her after school and took her a ticket in my trembling hands. We sat down outside and chatted about school but I had trouble telling her about my gig. Each time I tried to pluck up the courage to ask her to come a ball would fly out of nowhere and ruin the moment. If that wasn't enough, I had a pair of ferrets making a racket in front of me too! Strangely, the more balls I kicked away, the more confident I got. Maybe it was something about my kicking to the rhythm but the ferrets seemed to calm down too. I was sure this was the perfect moment to tell her how I feel...

[US] *cough* (Excuse me.) First of all, let me welcome and congratulate all of our... *ah-CHOO* new employees. Next, I need to tell you the most important thing you can know about working at our company: Wherever you are, whatever you do here, from the assembly line to Accounts Payable, remember to mind the flow. For proof, consider our executives seated there. They all came from humble origins but rose to the top because they embrace flow. If you want to climb the ladder here, you've gotta develop your flow! All right, everyone. Stand up and repeat after me: One! Start the spin smoothly and flow to a halt. Two! At lunchtime, season freely with flowing pepper and salt. *Ahhh-CHOOOOO!* (Excuse me.)

[UK, article is named 'An Upbeat Business Strategy'] Achoo! Ahem...Good morning ladies and gentlepigs. Congratulations on becoming the newest members of our organisation! Before you start working in this prestigious company, I would like to give you some important advice. No matter what we do, in this company, we are always upbeat! This is at the forefront of our business strategy. Even when times are tough, we believe success can always be achieved by keeping upbeat. The board came to realise its importance through a lot of hard work and spinning themselves. If you want to make it far in this company, you should make being upbeat your priority too! So, everybody stand up and join me in squealing. "All together now! Be upbeat! Turning ourselves around helps us turn profits round!" A...aaaah...chooooooooo!

[US] Do you hate looking at your watch, afraid of how late you are to your meeting, date, or appointment? Is the mere act of checking the time a source of stress and unhappiness in your life? If so, you need a Monkey Watch! It won't make you any less late for things, but there's no way to frown after looking at it! Seriously! It's medically impossible! We asked some science guys about it! So buy your Monkey Watch today and smile the rest of your life! WARNING: Using Monkey Watch continuously may make the monkeys tired. Let them rest occasionally for more accurate timekeeping.

[UK, article is named 'Current Trends'] Are you always late? Do you struggle to know what time it is? Are your wrists drab and boring?

[US] On the work floor...

[UK] On the work floor...

 

Production line, keep in time: Get '''into '''your work!

Production line, keep in time:'''Watch''' your timing!

Production line, keep in time: remember your due '''dates'''!

Production line, keep in time: Put a '''spike '''in efficiency!

Production line, keep in time: Keep at it like '''clockwork'''!

Production line, keep in time: Maintain a '''positive '''attitude!

Production line, keep in time: Keep the company '''afloat'''!

Production line, keep in time: '''Feed '''your efficiency!

Production line, keep in time: '''Kick '''your bad habits!

Production line, keep in time: No '''breaks'''.

Production line, keep in time: Work '''faster'''!

Production line, keep in time: Remember to take it '''easy'''.

Being in time on the production line will make you feel '''real '''fine!

If the production line is running fine, you won't have to do '''overtime'''!

Our production line's made piece by piece so our '''profits'' '''''will increase!

Understand the rhythm and you will see it put a '''spike '''in our efficiency!

Our rhythm masters have some quirks but keep it running like '''clockwork'''!

Out widgets might not be much to note but they keep our company '''afloat'''!

This production line's all we need except for our daily drink and '''feed'''!

We always work with a '''positive '''attitude to gain our customer's gratitude!

Do your best and you will '''find '''you'll have fun on this production line!

The production line's in high '''demand''', when will my work ever end?

Just when you're starting to give up, the production line just '''speeds''' up!

The production line has a clear rhythm, just do your '''best '''and don't give in!

[US] High above the Rhythm Islands...

[UK, article is named 'Quick and Slow'] High above the Rhythm Islands, a blue and red plane could be seen flying in tight formation.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

[US] I am called the Wandering Samurai, due to my devotion to the samurai code of Bushido and my generally poor sense of direction.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

[US] Hello, and thank you for your interest in Rhythm Rockets! These are sure to make your next outer-space voyage fun and memorable! We have four models this year, and I'll be happy to explain the differences.

 

[UK, article is named 'Mini Rocket Development'] Hello! Thank you for your interest in Rhythm Rockets! We currently have four rocket models in production. Let me explain to you the differences between them.

I think you'll find we have a mini-rocket for every occasion and one that can compliment your lives. So, please order one now before they sell out!

[US] Promoting their eagerly anticipated new single "Love Rap,"[sic] the Love Posse (featuring MC Adore) is coming to a town near you! Opening for the Posse will be those twin quasars of hip-hop, the RAPMEN. Check online for dates and venues. Advance tickets are $60, and each comes with an MC Adore sticker. Tickets at the door are also $60 but do NOT come with a sticker. Plan ahead! Don't miss it!

 

[UK, article is named 'Hip Hop Press'] In anticipation of The Love Posse feat. MC Adore's new single "Love Rap", the band will be performing an exclusive live set for a limited number of fans. Of course, you can expect everyone's favourite rapping due "The Love Posse" to be providing the backing too!

[US] "I want to be a star!" That was what I thought every minute of every day after I moved to this town. Then I saw the most important flyer on the most important café bulletin board of my life.

 

[UK] I had always wanted to become famous and came to this town to try and achieve my dreams! When I saw an audition poster in a cafe, I knew the chance had finally arrived.

 

[US] "I dunno. It's like everyone just decides what it means and passes their judgment and expects me to behave in a certain way. I mean, first of all, it's my name, like my actual, this-is-what-my-birth-certificate-says NAME. It doesn't reflect me as a person. And hey, words can mean more than one thing, you know? Just because the first thing YOU think of is some happy-go-lucky sap doesn't mean...Ugh. I know, I come in here every week and the spend whole session griping about this. You're probably tired of hearing about it by now. Do you ever have problems like this? Do people just look at you and assume that you're into, I dunno, copying what people do?"

 

 

 

 

 

<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-GB" style="mso-ansi-language:EN-GB">Hey, you there! Yes, you! In front of the TV! Congratulations on getting a Perfect on Remix 10! Nicely done! Oh, and thanks for much for just playing this far into the game! It’s always gratifying when someone goes to the trouble, you know? We’ve been watching you doing your best, playing real hard. It’s inspiring. Did you have fun? Was it hard to get here? Maybe you have friends who say it was easy. Hmph.Whatever. But let’s talk about you some more! You probably found your sense of rhythm improving, huh? …Right? If you haven’t already done so, you should totally have your friends try out this game. You know there’s a two-player mode, right? All right, let’s say it was your destiny to battle and evil wrestler army, and only you could do it. You might be sad that you had such a rough destiny ahead of you. But what if, by battling the evil wrestler army, you could make a lot of people smile? Then you might think, “That’s a pretty good destiny.” That’s all we wanted to say. Hopefully we’ll see you out there again sometime. Enjoy your evening. -- This message brought to you by the mysterious Rhythm League. </span></p>